Quiet pump for a Biorb

Or not.

If anybody's wife gets themselves a Biorb (60, in this case) and sticks it in the living room, and then anybody thinks that they can sort out the well-I-wouldn't-get-away-with-this unreasonable racket made by the external air pump by suggesting they replace the pump with a slightly better specced "silent" pump like the Tetratec APS150.....   well, don't.

It might possibly be a different pitch, but it still makes equal noise and vibration.
Might try a (slightly-less-well-specced) Eheim when the embarrassment of the first failure has subsided...

UPDATE: 2013-11-13.
Eheim 3701.  Wahey!  Slightly less powerful, but much quieter than either the original or the Tetratec.